What To Do When You Experience The "Puppy Blues"
Half of new puppy owners feel frustrated, anxious or exhausted by their new pup - you're not alone!
Half of new puppy owners feel frustrated, anxious or exhausted by their new pup - you're not alone!
August 16, 2024
If your excitement about getting a gorgeous new puppy has turned to despair…know you’re not alone!
A new study has found that HALF of puppy owners get the “puppy blues” and report feeling significant negative feelings such as anxiety, frustration and weariness in the early weeks of their pup's life.
I can back this data up with personal observations from my Virtual Puppy School - so many of our members have moments where they become overwhelmed and exhausted by raising their pup. Many even wonder if they’ve made the right decision. It’s an incredibly common experience - those early weeks can be seriously full on. Just look at some of these comments from recent members…
But simply knowing you’re not alone isn’t going to be enough to help you feel better, so let’s look at some things you CAN do to survive this time and actually start enjoying your pup again.
A big cause of the overwhelm I see from our members stems from concern that their puppy is naughtier than normal, not progressing or that they have failed their pup in some way. When you’re dealing with broken sleep, constant painful biting, hyperactivity and destructive behaviour, it can be easy to despair and feel like there’s something wrong with your pup or something wrong with the way you’re raising them. It might feel like they’re going to be this way forever.
All of this “naughty behaviour” is NORMAL puppy behaviour, your puppy isn’t broken! This intense phase will pass, your pup will mature, and the training work you’re doing will start to sink in eventually.
As with people, pups are individual and just because your friend’s pup was a sleepy, calm delight, doesn’t mean there is something wrong with yours. Puppies all have different temperaments, and some will be naturally more “full on” than others - this can come down to breed, age, how much training your pup had before they came to you, and individual personality. Your pup may be more exhausting than another, but all pups can grow into beautifully calm and well-behaved dogs.
There’s a long list of things to achieve when you’re training a pup, but when it gets overwhelming it’s time to really focus on the essentials, and on the things that are going to make your life with your pup easier. My top three suggestions are:
Get a good set up for house training and separation training
Having a good set up in your home will make everything so much easier for you. A crate and play pen area for your pup is very helpful for house training, separation training, preventing destructive behaviour when you’re unable to supervise, and simply allowing you to get a bit of space from your pup without them getting into mischief. It’s well worth investing a bit of energy into getting a good set up, then teaching your pup to be happy there. Plus, pups tend to be much less mischievous when they’re well rested, and this provides a quiet space for your pup to get plenty of rest.
Bonding
Having a good bond with your pup makes everything possible and importantly, enjoyable! A well bonded pup will focus on you, respect you more and WANT to learn from you. This means less biting, and easier training. Some easy ways to bond with your pup include cuddling and contact, taking charge of resources (food, freedom, contact), play, and mentor bond training such as my signature Joining Up technique and teaching your pup to gaze into your eyes.
Socialisation
This is the one that you really can’t afford to drop the ball on. Your pup builds 80% of their social understanding during their Formative Period (2-4 months). If you don’t do enough socialisation in this time, there is a high risk of your pup becoming fearful, reactive and/or aggressive. Socialise with people (of different age, race, gender), other dogs, and other species such as cats, chicken and sheep. If you can’t manage anything else, do this.
Having a team of people you can rely on bolster you when you’re feeling ‘over it’, share in your experiences, and offer you practical advice to help you through the puppy period…is priceless. If your immediate circle of family and friends can’t offer you this support, come and connect with hundreds of other people going through the same thing as you in our Virtual Puppy School. I can honestly say you won’t find a nicer, more supportive bunch of people (just have a look at some of the comments below…)
In our members-only Facebook page, our dog trainers answer all your questions. But our other school members will also jump in to lend their opinion, share what worked for them, give product recommendations, arrange socialisation meet-ups or just show some support! Many of them are just a little bit further ahead in their puppy training journey, so know what you’re going through and what it takes to get to the other side.
Plus, you’ll get an easy-to-follow week by week training guide so you know exactly what to do with your pup and when, this alone can greatly reduce that overwhelm.
If you’re still feeling overwhelmed, reach out and send me a message. Myself or a member of my dog training team will be happy to offer you some advice to help you reach a happier place with your pup. We’re here to help!
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